Friendship in Midlife

I have a solid, and intentionally small, tribe I cherish as dear friends. And I wouldn’t have it any other way. These are friendships from high school throughout my 20s, 30s, 40s, and now into midlife. They are rare, meaningful, and feel like chosen family.

As we become more seasoned in age, we place far more value on the quality of friendships versus the quantity. Pruning, renewing, and repurposing are natural and necessary parts of personal growth. With that growth and experience, I’ve become good at weeding out transactional friendships and cultivating the ones that reflect mutual care. These are relationships rooted in trust, acceptance, kindness, authenticity, and respect.

In midlife, friendships take on a deeper meaning – community, something I’ve been thinking about more and more. Our lives are so different. Booked and busy with career plateaus or shifts, caregiving responsibilities, kids preparing for college and leaving the nest, thinking about or preparing for retirement; life is really life-ing.

And with all of that, there’s the benefit of clarity. You know what you want in a friend—and what you don’t. That discernment and wisdom shape how and who you choose to build community with. It’s also an opportunity to stretch beyond your comfort zone. Could you benefit from more diversity in thought or experience? Are your current friendships challenging you to grow, or are they keeping you stagnant? Looking past the familiar can lead to surprising connections and meaningful friendships.

The friendships we build and maintain in midlife can become the most grounded, genuine relationships in this chapter of our lives. They are supportive, allowing you to be unfiltered and fully seen. They are loyal and always show up when it matters most. They are your guideposts to help light a path when you don’t know how or where to take the next step. Most importantly, our friendships give us the space to evolve. It’s the raised eyebrow or gentle nudge to push us out of your comfort zone, but also honoring who you’ve always been and who you’re becoming.

Up for a challenge? This week, reach out to a friend and let them know what you appreciate about them. And if you’re feeling empowered, connect with someone new who might become an unexpected addition to your circle.

Until next time – be a good HUMAN ✨